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A co-worker says to his friend, "Since the boss isn´t here why don´t you go home?" So the guy goes home and sees his boss f*cking his wife. He sneaks out and rushes back to work, and says to his co-worker, "That was some bad advice that you gave me, I almost got caught."

Women in Iraq are protesting by shaving their pussies. Their banners say, "Read our lips: no more bush"

A blond goes to a pet shop to buy bird seeds. The cashier asks, "How many birds do you have?" The blond replies, "None stupid, I am going to grow some."

(Question)- How do you know it´s a blonde asking for your phone number? (Answer)- She called you to ask for your number.

A blond and a brunnette were walking on a trail, and the brunnette yells, "Look a dead bird!", and the blond looks up at the sky and asks, "Where?"

When I read about the dangers of drinking, I gave up reading.

(Question) - What does a man and a ship have in common? (Answer) - There both full of sea men (semen).

Last week, I bought a new radio for my car. It was the greatest radio. When I yelled Reggae it played reggae; and when I yelled rap it played rap. One day I was driving and some kids ran in front of me, and I yelled f*cking kids, and the radio started playing a Michael Jackson song.

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