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joke - Comics/Fantasy/Anime
before.bedtime.peperonity.net

☻Animal Jokes☻

What’s small and cuddly and bright purple?
A koala holding his breath!

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What happens when a cat eats a lemon?
It becomes a sour puss!

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Why are elephants wrinkled?
Have you ever tried to iron one?

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What do you get if you cross a fish with an elephant?
Swimming trunks!

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Why do elephants never forget?
Because nobody ever tells them anything!

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What day do fish hate?
Fry-day.

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What do call a bear with no ears?
B!

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Where do cows go on Saturday nights?
To the MOOO-vies!

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Why is it hard to play cards in the jungle?
There are too many cheetahs!

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When is it bad luck to see a black cat?
When you’re a mouse!

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!

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What does a kitten become after it's three days old?
Four days old!

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What do you get when you cross a parrot with a centipede?
A walkie talkie!

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What kind of animal goes OOM?
A cow walking backwards!

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What animal has more lives than the cat?
A frog, he croaks every night.

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What is a crocodiles favorite game
Snap

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What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?
He gets toad away.

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What do you get when you cross a parrot with a pig?
A bird who hogs the conversation.

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What did one flea say to the other flea?
Shall we walk or take the dog?

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What do you get if you cross a crocodile with a flower?
I don't know, but I'm not going to smell it!

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What’s the difference between an injured lion and a wet day?
One pours with rain, the other roars with pain!

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What is the strongest animal?
A snail. He carries his house on his back!

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What is the difference between a flea and a wolf ?
One prowls on the hairy and the other howls on the prairie!

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What did the clean dog say to the insect ?
Long time no flea!

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How do you find where a flea has bitten you?
Start from scratch!

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What do you call an elephant in a phone box?
Stuck!

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What do you get when you cross a porcupine with a balloon?
POP!

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Where do hamsters come from?
Hamsterdam.

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What kind of snake is good at math?
An adder.

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Why are igloos round?
So polar bears can’t hide in the corners!

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What do you give an elephant with big feet?
Plenty of room!

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How do you get an elephant down from a tree?
Put him on a leaf and wait until autumn!

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What’s grey and squirts jam at you?
A mouse eating a doughnut!

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Why aren’t elephants allowed on beaches?
They can’t keep their trunks up!

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What has six eyes but cannot see?
Three blind mice!

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Joey: I lost my dog.
Lauren:Why don't you put an ad in the newspaper?
Joey: Don't be silly! He can't read

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How does a hedgehog play leap-frog?
Very carefully!

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What happened to the cat that swallowed a ball of wool?
She had mittens!

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What do you call a gorilla wearing ear-muffs?
Anything you like! He can’t hear you!

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What do you give an elephant that’s going to be sick?
Plenty of space!

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