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Mini Stories

*Queen Of South Park 1975*

Here are some funny stories with some SLIGHT relevence to Queen

1) Get In The Ring

Brian: Hello! Brian May here! You´re probably all wondering what im doing here on Mars...Well the fact is,Ive come up here to get away from all you people constantly asking me when im gonna get mt hair cut!

Brian(quoting): ´When you gonna get your hair cut,Brian?? Its been like that for years!´

Brian(speaking normally again): Im a nice guy but Im NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! So ive moved up here with my wife Angie from Eastenders and we´re gonna breed a race of poodle-haired people! SO THERE!

Angie: Cor Luv A Duck

the telephone: RING RING!

Angie: It´s Slash. He says can he come too??

Brian: Only if he swaps his cowboy boots for clogs!!

2) Flann and Godfrey

Godfrey...I have a problem

OOOOH! Spill the beans!

I´m giving birth to an antelope you fool!!


Why...aren´t you??

Um...well I was just dissapionted that it wasn´t a girraffe

Well...I couls possibly be impregnated by a beaver if you want. Would that do??

No!I want IT to be big...if you know what i mean

Exscuse me,my thingy isn´t that big so get to hell

So you can fit the patio furnature up there but not a girraffe??


I can´t believe that you´d hurt my feelings soooo much...YOU´RE NOT GETTING ANY ACCESS TO THIS BASTRD!!!!!

Em....okay...furk this. Wana get high

YTHINK?? Why the hell do ya think I´m giving birth to a furking antelope!?

You do it every bloody week!
FIRST it was gerbils,THEN lemurs,NOW ANTELOPES!!


Written by me and Sinead in Maths

3) Beelzebub

Well once apon a time there lived this devil worshiper called ´BuB´. Now BuB was an extrodanery man.
Although he worshiped the devil...cast spells on little bunny rabbits to turn tem into his slaves...make plans to eat his
next door neighbour and so on and so forth,his plans were very inventive. One day a young woman came by and knocked on
the door. He answered it and looked the woman up and down in a very uncomfortable way. She slapped him and all at once
he threw a plastic bag over her head to see what she would do. She threw the bag she had with her up in the air and tried
to set her self free from BuB´s clutches,failing this she kicked him in the nuts but he didnt even flinch. At this point the lady
was feeling rather faint and colapsed on the doorstep. BuB...being rather confused in what had just happened let her go and
shut the door. He pondered for a while and looked out the window an hour later to see if she was still there. She was. Maybe
Beelze will take her...if he´s in the mood. So BuB screamed in the shrillest voice you could ever hear and instead of the evil
one appearing,Roger Taylor floated down from the sky in all his eternal bueaty and gorgeousness!! BuB was rather taken aback
and cowerd at the Wrath Of The Rog and ran into the kitchen. Roger followed shortly after with the young woman in his arms
and said sorry darling...this broad is mine. WHAT!? screamed BuB. I do not think so! She died of her own free hell
did she! proclaimed Roger...twas you BEELZEBUB!!!! No you are mistaken Roger i am BuB...oh feck this...n all this noble shite!
replied BuB. Cmon Rog....Shes the fecking Avon Lady!!

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