peperonity.net
Welcome, guest. You are not logged in.
Log in or join for free!
 
Stay logged in
Forgot login details?

Login
Stay logged in

For free!
Get started!

Text page


bdob - Man Jobs/Masturbation
gaysexadvice.peperonity.net

72.broken heart

boogeybrown@ ya....




my boyfriend recently brokeup with me, we havnt talked about it but hes made it clear why. its my insecurities and lack of trust. he loves me but has given me reasons to be insecure by hs many friends and online chatting. I am afraid he may have had affairs but I hav no evidence. I want hm back and believe we can work thngs out but how do I trust hm and get over my fears.


ANS.

A.chettymarks@ yahoo.com. au> wrote:

That would be almost impossible. I don't believe there is anything he can do to make you trust him, and if you cannot do that on your own, it will always be a bad situation for you. If you actually had a reason to mistrust him, such as the knowldege that he cheated on you, then it could be acceptable that you mistrust him. I do fear that you will have this problem with almost any guy you hook up with, so i think the best thing for you to do it try to learn to be more trusting of people until you actually have a reason to mistrust. you only other option is to find a boyfriend who has no friends, and owns no computer.


B.True, Chester, true. Boogeybrown, you obviously realize that the problem may be within yourself. Often people who have a hard time trusting others have issues with their own self esteem. They often feel inadequate in some way(s) and think that los of other people will be able to steal their man. Your worries about affairs seem to be irrational (that is they have no basis and you are overreacting to your own inner worries). As a result people get jealous and this leads to "clinginess" and "ownership" of the other person, which is GREATLY annoying and can ruin a relationship (I've had "clingly" boyfriends and I know). If your boyfriend spent ALL his time chatting with other guys and being with his freinds, that would be one thing, but you didn't make it sound as if that were the case. Here is some advice most people don't like to hear, but I can attest that it is well worth it. If you really want to help yourself, seek some professional help. A good therapist will help you recognize why you feel insecure and then help you deal with those issues. They can't fix it for you, only you can do that, but they can help you find the right track and help you stay on it. Don't let anymore good relationships get away from you for things you can learn to control. Good luck.

Bret
bretr4@yahoo.com

C.You're either really young, recently 'out' or a combination thereof. Insecurity is a way of life in gay society. It's proven that men, straight or gay, have a tendency to be chronically horny. There was a time when I was in my early 20's where my bf couldn't view porn of any kind. Of course, I had it in the house all the time. He was bi, and images of women were forbidden. I can compete with another guy, not a woman! One night we were supposed to meet with friends for drinks and dancing. Someone brought a woman from out of town. Well, he didn't call me to tell me where to meet them and didn't come home that night. He called in the morning and told me he'd slept with her. It was at that moment I came to the conclusion that 'love' and 'sex' are 2 separate concepts. He wasn't looking to sleep with a woman... it just happened after a few too many drinks. Now I'm in a relationship that will be 12 years this summer (different person) and both of us have had sex with others. We both know about it.
You may be able to get over the suspicion and insecurity over time. However, until you're able to, plan on many short relationships. Counseling is one approach, but intensive soul searching and personal assessment is cheaper. Some people can't overcome the feelings you've put forth but it doesn't make it impossible to find someone. Figure yourself out before you attempt to repair the relationship you had.
As a side note: I wouldn't bother pursuing your former relationship. I don't know how long you were together but, from my experience, those reasons aren't 100% why he left. Chances are that, more than likely, if you fix those issues he'll find another reason not to stick around.
I know it hurts, but......... ..!
sauerho566@yahoo.com


This page:




Help/FAQ | Terms | Imprint
Home People Pictures Videos Sites Blogs Chat
Top
.