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Check aLL My Fav and FuNNiesT sMs's mwahz.

Mickey & Minnie m0use were getting a div0rce... The judge said t0 Mickey... so y0u say y0ur wife is crazy?... N0! Said Mickey... I said she was Fucking G00fy!!

A new s0ccer game f0r the blind... A little bell is attatched t0 the ball s0 that they can hear where it g0es... In the 1st game the icecream man was kicked t0 death...

If y0u ever need a FUCK c0unt 0n me
F - friend
U - u
C - can
K - keep 4 life
yep thats right. Im y0ur fuck f0r life ;)

Im pr0p0gating a unicameral f0rm 0f idi0syncrasy 0ccuring malev0lently in the meriti0us piece 0f claterubial brain. In sh0rt... Im thinking 0f y0u.

Y0ur my Funny, Understanding, Cute, Kind, Intelligent, Naughty, Gener0us, Sexy, H0nest, Independent, Trustful friend, in 0ther w0rds y0ur the FUCKING SHIT.

Little girl sp0ts 2 spiders mating. "Dad what are they d0ing?" Dad, "They are mating." Girl, "What d0 y0u call the 0ne 0n t0p?" Dad, "The daddy l0ng leg." Girl, "So is the 0ther a m0mmy l0ng leg?" Dad, "N0, they're b0th daddy l0ng legs" The girl flattens them b0th sh0uting "We'll have n0ne 0f that Gay shit in 0ur garden!!!"

Jake says t0 Pete, "I hear y0u have a huge c0ck..." Pete replies "Damn dude, y0u sh0uld'nt believe everything y0ur wife says"

Wife catches husband in bed with a y0unger w0man, she thr0ws him 0ut the wind0w sh0uting "Y0u fucking insect, if y0u sting y0u can fly aswell!!"

sTaRs aRe SeeN T0geTheR, yeT They aRe So faR aPaRT... TRue fRieNds May n0T speak eveRy Day buT yeT They're cl0se @ heaRt

3angels were said t0 be missing fr0m heaven, I was f0und drunk in a bar, the sec0nd 0ne was f0und in jail, and the sweetest 0f them all was f0und reading this msg.

Had an X-ray d0ne just n0w, Guess what they f0und? it was y0u, safely tucked in my heart. They said my heart is fine, rem0ve y0u.... Im DEAD!

Due t0 the sad state 0f my sex life i have c0nverted t0 Islam. My new name is Seld0m bin Layed.

Where w0uld y0u be if y0u had... All the m0ney y0t want, n0 w0rries, the finest meal waiting at h0me, y0ur bath is run, kids are perfect, and y0ur partner is waiting with 0pen arms and kisses. Wherd w0uld y0u be? At the wr0ng f*cking h0use!

What d0 y0u call a female bird sitting legs 0pen 0n a treebranch? A pr0stitweety! W0t duz she chirp? CHEAP CHEAP!

Sex is like a petr0l stati0n, s0metimes y0u get full service, s0metimes its 0ut 0f service, and s0metimes y0u have t0 be satisfied with selfservice.

Tw0 whales 0verturn a ship using their bl0w h0les. "Can we eat the crew?" asked 1 wale. "N0" sait the 0ther. "We d0 bl0wj0bs but we d0n't swall0w seamen!"

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